Phonecall of Apology [RP for fey_fire]

[sandandwater]

Pippa logs off the computer with a resigned sigh and turns to stare down her phone. She will call him and apologize. She owes Rory at least that much. Right. Well, calling involves picking up the phone and dialing. Groaning, she rubs her brow with one hand and reaches for the receiver with the other.

At least she doesn't have to think about the digits involved, she only has to hit redial and let the phone reconnect her to the musician. Pippa says a little prayer that Rory isn't still asleep, waking him from slumber twice really wouldn't be a good sign.

It's ringing, she's waiting with a looming trepidation.

Please pick up, Ro. I can't handle a voice mail right now.

Comments

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

God help him. Rory sits at his desk, guitar on one side, keyboard on the other, with his head pillowed on his folded forearms. He has two songs crying out for completion, a bit of day work at the Murphy stables that afternoon, and three errands to get done between now and then ... and he can't focus on any of it.

All because of two things he found in bed with him that morning: his composition notebook with the words Get Pippa alone and kiss her scrawled in his handwriting, and his cell phone which showed that he took a call in the faint small hours before dawn ... from Pippa Kerr.

And now he has no idea how much of the blurred images and softly spoken words teasing in and out of his memory is real, and how much a dream. The things he remembers saying ... and hearing ... dear God ...

When his ring tone goes off he startles like a week-old colt. Fumbling his cell off the desk, he checks the number. Pippa. A swallow, a silent prayer, and he opens the phone.

"Hello? Pippa?" His voice softens on her name.

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

He answered. He answered and his voice is so soft, he doesn't sound upset to hear from her at all. Still, she has to force herself to breathe and respond. She can feel the blush creeping up the back of her neck, warming her cheeks, as she says his name. "Hi, Ro...

"How...how are you? Get enough sleep now?" She's flailing mentally, emotionally, as she looks around the room. How does she even begin to address this morning? How do you apologize for things you aren't necessarily sorry about? "I'm not keeping you from anything, am I?"

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

Her voice brings even more detail flooding back, but he's still not certain how much of it actually happened. Did he really ... and did she ...?

"No, lass, you're not interrupting anything." Nothing that wasn't already interrupted anyway. "I'm fine, I'm just--" How to even broach the subject? "--I've been a bit distracted this morning."

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

She has a sinking suspicion that she knows exactly why he's so distracted and it creates a heavy feeling in the pit of her stomach. What has she done? He's probably trying to figure out a way to recant everything he said without coming off as an insensitive jerk.

She sighs. She'll let him off the hook if he likes. "About that..." Her hand rakes through her tangled hair, she's still not bothered to put herself to rights today. She showered but still isn't dressed and has let her mane of curls do whatever it likes.

"Ro, I owe you an apology. I'm so sorry for my middle of the night--very early morning, I guess it was--I don't know what I was thinking and I'm sorry if I said things I shouldn't have."

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

What? Oh, no ... no no no, don't be sorry. "Pippa, I--" He hesitates, licks his lips and searches for words. "If I sound confused, it's not because you did anything wrong. I was just so sleepy ... I remember you calling, and I know I wrote something in my notebook." He swallows before continuing, "I remember the two of us talking, but I'm not sure how much of it was real and how much was ... wishful dreaming." Though the sex pretty much had to be a dream, unfortunately.

He took a deep breath and forged on. "But I know you didn't say anything that needs an apology." Another swallow. "I hope I didn't get out of line. I thought I was dreaming at one point, and just said ... exactly what came to mind." Did I actually tell you I want to take you to bed and run my hands and lips all over your skin? Because I do ...

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

He doesn't

--Pippa isn't sure if she's relieved that Rory's memory is hazy or not. On one hand this lets

her

off the hook. On the other, and this is what makes her heart feel heavy, he doesn't think the things she said were real. And they are. So very real and true.

She smiles at his words, the tone of his voice. Even now, he's being polite and charming. And he did say wishful dreaming...

"I was wide awake." Hook or no, she has to let him know that she meant the things she told him so many hours ago. She lets out an airy breath and tucks herself more firmly into her bed for the secure feeling the pillows and comforter provide. "I don't want to apologize for what I said to you, Ro. I do need to say I'm sorry for how I said it. The way I did...drunk. In the middle of the night. Over the phone."

She does regret that, some of what she confessed really deserved to be shared in person. And yet, here she is on the phone again. "I'm sorry I waited until you were half asleep to talk to you."

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

Thank God. The worry tightening his chest, that he might somehow have offended her without even realizing it, eases on a sigh. And she's not sorry for what she said, but how much did she say? How much did he--?

He has to know. To know where he stands, if nothing else.

"Pippa ... if it's not too awkward--" Please don't let it be too awkward. "--I'd like to know what happened. I know I made plans to kiss you the next time I saw you." He can't keep a warm smile off his face or out of his voice. "I remember singing you a lullaby. I'm pretty sure that was real."

Grasses of May, man, spit it out! "But I also remember telling you I want you ... talking about ways I wanted to make love to you." Deep breath. "I know I didn't say anything I didn't mean, but I'd like to know how much of it actually made it out my lips and to your ears."

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

She remembers being openly honest and direct in her intoxicated state, it still mortifies her, some of what she said to him...

And now he's asking her to confirm...

There's a thud, crashing noise and some scrambling on her end of the line as she drops the phone from the absolute shock of reality setting in now that she's cold sober. The phone, wedged between her bed and the wall, is just out of reach as she slips her hand into the crevice to retrieve it.

Oh, dear God. What must he be thinking. Don't hang up...don't hang

--her hand closes around the phone and she lifts it back to her ear even as she swallows hard.

Her heart feels like it's lodged in her throat. She swallows again and tries to answer him.

Where to start?

Her voice is quiet, low in hopes of hiding the fact that she's nervous and on the verge of trembling, "All of it..."

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

All of it. All of it. Her telling him that she wanted to kiss him and hold him and let him do anything he wanted with her. Him telling her that he wanted to find every sensitive spot on her body; make slow, sweet love to her and sing her to sleep afterward. All of it.

I don't think I could stand it if you broke my heart.

It'd be ... other way 'round ...

In the midst of the riot of emotions surging through him, he finds one certainty. "I am going to kiss you the next time I get you alone," he says. "You know that, don't you?"

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

She bites her lip, nods and can feel the blush in her cheeks again. Then she smiles. "I--"

Oh, don't be bashful now, you've already put it all out there for him,

"I want you to, Ro. I really want you to."

She closes her eyes and silently squeals, did she just say that? Yes, yes she did. Happiness, pure giddy delight at what's happening between them, makes laughter bubble up and Pippa can't contain it. "I'm sorry I'm laughing. I'm not--it's not you, I just--I'm happy."

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

"So am I, sweet." And he is. Oh, issues will have to be dealt with, and he'll have to tell her things about himself with no way of knowing how she'll react, but that's all later. Right now he can hear her laughter sparkling in his ear and let his own well up in answer. Right now he can let anticipation of that kiss warm him from the inside out.

Of course it all begs the question of when he will be able to get her alone. He sighs, "I'd be tempted to come over right now, but I've got too much on my plate today." Stretching in his chair, he resists the temptation to cancel it all. "What will you be doing?"

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

She sobers as he answers her next question before she's had the chance to ask it. He's too busy to see her. Common sense and the realization that life's little obligations and priorities still have to be met knock the wind out of her sails just a bit. She hopes he doesn't notice. "Me?"

She does laugh again, only it's self-deprecating in nature now. Looking down at her rumpled self she shrugs. "If I manage to put something besides pajamas on and find my hairbrush, I'm considering the day a success. What's got you so busy?"

[fey-fire.livejournal.com]

He sighs gustily and lets his wistfulness creep into his voice. "Songwriting, errands and a day job at a stable near Albany. If it were just the songwriting and errands, I'd be over in a heartbeat."

And now he's imagining her all sleep-tousled in PJs that are probably far more abbreviated than what she's actually wearing. Put it in neutral until later, man.

[sand-andwater.livejournal.com]

She has to bite her lip to keep herself from asking him detailed questions about the stable job. God, how she misses riding. "Albany...that's quite a drive. I'm not holding you up, am I?" She won't ask him to forgo his obligations, she has some dignity still intact even after last night's embarrassing phone call.